So, the other day I was watching some show on BBC, or maybe PBS, but more than likely BBC, and some character in whatever it was that I was watching was eating Bangers and Mash.You know,the sausages with mashed potatoes and gravy. As I watched I said to myself “huh”. This is usually a sign that the over-taxed hamster that runs the wheel inside my cranium was working, again.
I do not wanna hear about that hamster on the wheel in my skull is not vegan.He was adopted, and does it for fun. So, get off my back.
Anyways, so I decided I would make it.I mean, I think I have said enough times that I have a deep and vivid love and adoration for comfort food.It is one of the key pillars of who I am.Or some such nonsense.
I made mine with chickpeas, because why not? This is hardly an original idea, and have seen them plenty of places on the internet, between surfing for porn and Morrissey songs. Okay, that is only partially true.I do not need to look for any Morrissey songs.I have them all! Duh!
Well, so I made them with chickpeas, some gluten, some spices and a bit of magic. I am a bit of a kitchen warlock.
As you may also have noticed, I am talking out of my ass , and should maybe just get to the recipe.
Sausage Ingredients.
- 1 cup and a half of soaked, cooked, rinsed chickpeas.
- About a cup of gluten.
- 1/2 cup of roasted red peppers.
- 1 teaspoon red pepper flakes.
- 2 tablespoons of minced garlic.
- 2 teaspoons of basil.
- 2 teaspoons of oregano.
- 2 tablespoons of tahini.
- 1 tablespoon of steak sauce.
- 1/2 cup of veggie stock.
- 1 and a half tablespoons of fennel seed.
- Few dashes of salt.
- Few dashes of pepper.
- 1/2 cup or more of breadcrumbs.
Now, basically you could just go nuts and toss all this into a processor, mix it in there, and be done.I would suggest one thing though; That you add all the dry ingredients, first. Use your processor and mix them.
Then, add your wet ingredients to the mixture.If the mixture is too wet, add a bit more bread crumbs.If it seems too dry, well add more vegetable stock.
Form them into basic sausage shaped, and then wrap them in tin foil, like a tootsie roll, but very snug and tight,or they will expand and rip through the tin foil!
Steam them for 2 hours.Yes, I said it, two hours.Flavors take time, yo.So, make sure you add water to your pot you are using to steam them in!
Now, you should know how to make mashed potatoes.If you do not, you can leave my life and page, now. Sure, if I had made some exotic or fun change to them, it would be one thing.But. no, I am talking your typical , regular mashed potatoes.But!I did make an interesting gravy for them, so I will not post that.Yeah.
Gravy Ingredients
- 2 tablespoons of Earth Balance.
- 2 tablespoons of flour.
- 1 cup of vegetable stock.
- 1 tablespoon of molasses.
- 2 tablespoons of brown mustard.
Melt the butter over low/medium heat, stirring in the flour till it becomes a clumpy mess.Now you can add the veggie stock, molasses and the brown mustard.Bring to a low boil, and it will thicken.Stir, or you will just have a lumpy mess.
You will be happy I have no life and watch too much British programming.It is a bit unfortunate that they kind of look like cocks, but I suppose that was unavoidable.
I should warn you, up-front, before you go on, this may be another one of those ” I remember as a kid…” type posts.I tend to enjoy some nostalgia from time to time, so just know that I deal with some nostalgia from time to time when it comes to cooking and/or posting something.
I do not even fucking know why I am bothered to explain that; As if now, you will suddenly say ” No way, I will not read any posts that involve nostalgia.” Oh, no.None of THAT!
I really have no idea what I am talking about; You probably should be okay with nostalgia, so I will just keep this post moving.So, should I start over, with a cliche? Yes.
When was young, and my mama would be cooking for me, one of my favorite meals was, believe it or not, was meatloaf.She would toss in a bunch of seasonings, some egg, some breadcrumbs, some ketchup, and I would sit and eat it with some green beans, and a potato.That potato was sometimes tater tots, and sometimes it was mashed potatoes.
So, yeah, I made a TVP loaf, and it reminded me of my youth, thus the nostalgia.But, I did not stop there, no way.No siree bob.I kicked it up a notch, brought it to a new level.I stepped up to the plate, and knocked it out of the park.Enough with the cliches? Yeah, you are probably right.
TVP Loaf Ingredients.
- 1 and 1/2 cup of TVP.
- 1/ and 2/3 cup of vegetable stock.
- Salt
- Pepper
- 3 teaspoons of garlic powder.
- 2 teaspoons of onion powder.
- 1 teaspoon of thyme.
- 1 tablespoon of Braggs Liquid Aminos.
- 2 tablespoons of steak sauce.
- 2 tablespoons of Parsley.
- 2 tablespoons of oregano.
- 1 tablespoon of Basil.
- 1 large tablespoon of Egg-Replacer.
- 1 cup of breadcrumbs.
- 2 – 3 tablespoons of ketchup.
- 1 tablespoon of olive oil.
- 1/2 cup of chopped red onion.
Firstly, pre-heat your oven to 375 degrees.Then, you will want to put the TVP, the vegetable stock, a few dashes of pepper and salt, garlic powder, onion powder, thyme, Braggs, and steak sauce in a large enough skillet and cook over medium heat, till all the liquids have been absorbed.Easy, really easy, almost as easy as I am.Do not doubt me? Go look what is written about me on the bathroom walls allover South Station, in Boston.
Fine, that last part is a lie.
Anyways, once all the liquid is gone, you will need to place the TVP in a large bowl, with all the remaining ingredients.You can use a spoon to mix at first, but then you will need to use your hands.Mix and mold that loaf like you are back in 6th grade art class , and you are working with clay.
Spray a bread loaf pan with that non-stick stuff, plop your loaf in it, and bake for 25- 30 minutes, covered for most of it, then take the cover off the last 10 minutes, or so.
Meanwhile, while that is baking, you can do the other main part to this loaf, the part that will really be sending Cinderella to her ball.I have no idea what that means, not at all.
Mashed Potato Ingredients.
- 4 or 5 potatoes, peeled and chopped up.I used smaller ones, but not tiny.Just not huge ones.
- 2 tablespoons of paprika.
- 1/2 cup of soy milk.
- Salt.
- Pepper.
- 1 tablespoon of Earth Balance.
I am fairly certain you know how to make mashed potatoes.Or, rather, I am assuming and hoping that you do.So, you can basically just ignore this whole part if you want.Just add the paprika, and make sure they are not super soggy.
Anyways, boil your potatoes. When they are soft, mash them and add the butter, milk, paprika, salt , and the pepper.
The loaf should be ready, so remove it from the oven.Grab a baking pan, and also a cutting board.Carefully place the loaf, without burning yourself, on the cutting board.Now, frost the loaf with the mashed potatoes.You should be able to cover all sides and angles other than the bottom.You can then carefully flip it over, and cover that missed side.
Carefully place the now mashed potato covered loaf on the baking pan, and bake for ten minutes or so, at the same 375 degrees.
I slathered mine with grave, had some corn and peas, whatever.You can do with it what you want.I will not be upset, as how would I even know? Exactly.
Yeah, I like a thick gravy.You got a problem with that?
On a couple side notes; One, the photos are crap because I was a pig and wanted to eat,and not spend time snapping photos.Two, I suppose I could have talked about comfort food more instead of youthful nostalgia.Too late now.
I was going to talk about comfort food, and I just might.I have a bit of a bold statement to make; Well, yet another bold statement, as I tend to make many of them.I am bold.Bold was going to be my middle name, but then my mother wisely reconsidered once she realized what a horrible and silly name that would be.
Oh, yeah , I nearly rambled on without actually stating my bold statement.Here is is folks: Comfort food makes me comfortable.
That was a lot for me to say, I mean I feel as though the weight of a mighty potato sack full of stones was just lifted off my chest.I mean, wow! I sure do feel better now.Really, for realz.
But yes, I like comfort food, and who does not? I am pretty sure even Hitler enjoyed comfort food.See, comfort food has that ability to, well, make us comfortable.
But, dear, sweet, readers, do not despair, it is all not all comfort here.Sometimes, I put a plaid shirt on, and do stuff.Today, I chopped some wood, and for once that was not masturbation slang.I actually chopped wood.I had to, sadly.So, again, it is not all about comfort.
Do not believe me? Fine, have some evidence, you fucking cynics.
But , really, wow, you had to have evidence of that?Where is our bond of trust, and why has it been abused? There is a bit of Morrissey being quoted there, but I am not now going to post that song.So, if that is what you were expecting, you are dead wrong.Dead wrong, again, as you clearly doubted I was out chopping wood.Wow, that is hurtful of you.
but, I will post this song from my youth, as it is indeed fitting, and perhaps you could listen to it while you made the food I was going to suggest for you, or not.
Oh, yes, I had a recipe for you.A recipe inspired by someone else, when they mentioned a recipe I may like.I was debating a link to that recipe, as it was the inspiration, though it is hardly all that close.Should I? I guess I will.Fine.
So, yeah, here is a recipe, and a song.
I probably should have talked about what the recipe is, and told you how it is cheezy, uses TVP, and pasta, and is kind of like hamburger helper, but I did not.I do not feel bad about that now, as again, you doubted me and my chopping wood skills.Whatever.
Ingredients.
- 1 cup of TVP.Not the chunks, but the small stuff.
- 2 cups of vegetable stock.
- 1 tablespoon of Braggs Liquid Aminos, or soy sauce.
- 1 tablespoon of steak sauce.
- 1 teaspoon of onion powder.
- 1 teaspoon of garlic powder.
- A few dashes of salt.
- A few grinds of fresh pepper.Grinds? Yeah, I do not know , either.
- 1 tablespoon of gravy browner.
- One small can of tomato paste.
- 1/2 a cup of water.
- 2 tablespoons of nutritional yeast.
- 1/2 cup of a combination of both Cheddar and Moz Daiya.
- 1 teaspoon of thyme.
- 1 teaspoon of oregano.
- 1 tablespoon of balsamic vinegar.
- 1 cup of peas.I used frozen.
- Box of pasta, your choice, boiled and ready to go.
I suppose the bets place to start is to grab a good sized pot or skillet, I think I used a skilled, and fill it with the TVP and the two cups of vegetable stock.Then, add the Braggs, steak sauce, onion powder, and the garlic powder, salt, pepper, and the gravy browner.
Cook this over low-medium heat, stirring occasionally, till most of the liquid is gone.I cannot tell you how long this was, as I was not standing there timing it.I would hope you can just be alright and confident in yourself enough to tell when most of the liquid is gone.
Is it mainly gone? Okay, add the paste, water, nutritional yeast, thyme,oregano, and the Daiya.Stir in well, and let that cook for about 5 minutes, til the cheese is melty.You can also add some more salt and pepper, if you so desire.I probably did.Now add your balsamic vinegar, and the peas, and stir that in.See? Not a very complex recipe, is it?
We are not building the pyramids here, just some comfort food.Have I told you that I find comfort food , well, comforting?
I am sorry, I am rambling, as usual.I probably should not be sorry , as again you doubting my woodsman skills, but hey we all have to move on.
Toss in your cooked pasta, if the pasta has been sitting , and getting cold, let it warm up as you stir it in and let it sit there and cook through for a few minutes.Other wise, go ahead and pig out.
Enjoy your food, and enjoy getting comfortable.








